So, what actually is a Life Coach?

I will be honest with you… when it was suggested to me that I would make a great life coach, I didn’t really know what one was. Yes, I had heard of life coaching, but I thought that it was something that only happened in the US and I had a rather comical image in which the life coach was consulted on every decision, including whether to have sourdough or rye for lunch.

But since this seed had been planted, I thought I should find out more! Three years later and a certified life coach, I honestly believe that everyone should know about the power of coaching and the option to access coaching, should the need arise.

So how did it all begin?

We probably all know of coaching in the world of sport, and it is here that the concept has its roots. As an industry and a profession, 'life coaching' only really came into fruition in the 1980s as an extension of sports and then business coaching. Sports coaching itself evolved from teaching skills and developing techniques and physical aptitude to helping athletes improve their game through a much wider range of disciplines, including psychology, mindset and sports science. Sports coaching became a holistic discipline that looked at the whole person and not just the physical capability.

At the same time, the world of self-improvement was growing. Looking back through history, man has always sought out advice from others, from tribal elders, wise women, The Bible and the church. People were guided by religious values and with the emergence of the written word, guidebooks and magazines gave advice and solace to those who wanted to live well and happy. We were guided on how to raise our children, how to eat and to stay healthy, the joy of sex and how to awaken our inner goddess. The 1980’s and 90’s were the era of the Self-Help book.

Big business had also cottoned on to the idea that improving people and teams in a more holistic way, could have huge impact on performance, engagement and profitability. Blockbuster business books brought business coaching into the mainstream. It didn't take long for coaching techniques and strategies to leave the boardroom and follow workers into their homes, their relationships, their families and their lifestyles. The past 30 years has seen life become increasingly fast-paced, high-pressured and very often incredibly overwhelming. Coaching offered people space to take a step back, reassess their priorities and move forwards towards their goals with much-needed support.

Today, the coaching industry is continuing to gain in popularity worldwide with more and more coaches offering their services to a wider range and number of people. In the US and Australia, Life Coaching is now totally mainstream and many, many people will choose to work with a coach every year. Here in the UK it is gaining in popularity. As more people begin to question this highly stressful and pressurised world in which we live, more people are seeking out support to create the kind of lives that they really want to live.

 People turn to coaching because it IS:

• All about them - coaching believes the client is the expert of their own life and the client already has the answers, they just need to be asked the right questions.

• Forward-looking - it takes the past into consideration but primarily looks ahead, taking the client from where they are now, to where they want to be.

• Solution focused – people come to coaching because they have some kind of problem that they don’t feel able to solve by themselves. In moving from where they are, to where they want to be, solutions are found and the pathway to solving the problems are identified.

• Action-orientated - it is practical and focused on the client taking action. A coach cannot make change happen in isolation. A client needs to be ready for change to happen and prepared to do the work necessary.

• Enjoyable - it is a fundamentally positive experience that should leave the client feeling inspired, energised and motivated to take the action that they need. 

What life coaching is NOT:

• Therapy or Counselling: Therapy typically focuses on healing the wounds of the past. It deals with healing pain, dysfunction, and conflict within an individual or in relationships. The focus is often on resolving difficulties arising from the past that hinder or obstruct an individual’s emotional functioning in the present. Therapists and Counsellors have many years of highly specialised training and experience in order to manage the mental health or more complex needs that their clients bring. Coaching is still an unregulated industry and not all coaches will have recognised coaching qualifications – I certainly urge anyone considering employing a coach, to check out the training, skills and experience that they have.

• Mentoring: Mentoring has to do with providing advice and solutions to the challenges clients are facing. A mentor is an expert who provides wisdom and guidance based on his or her own experience.  Life Coaches have generally come from a wide range of life and work experience and most will have developed a coaching niche that reflects this. Within a coaching session, clients are supported to find their own answers and solutions. It is very best practice for a coach to ask permission of a client if they think that some mentoring or advice is appropriate, based on their expertise.

• Training or teaching: Unlike coaching, training/teaching sessions are usually learning focused. They are structured, formal and typically done in group settings. It involves the imparting or transferring of knowledge from the trainer to the client through writing, instruction, hands-on projects, etc. Whilst there may be writing or creative projects as part of the coaching process, these will always be self-exploratory and reflective, rather than instructive.

Why would you work with a Life Coach?

One of the main benefits of working with a life coach is the ability to gain a fresh, perspective on problems that you face. In addition to offering new insight into challenges, a life coach can help you to untangle what it is that holds you back and provide the encouragement, motivation and accountability that you need to get to where you want to be. If there are things you want to achieve or change in life, a coach can help you to make it happen in a way that is just not possible on your own. It is a time that is just for you – a time for you to be listened to, supported, encouraged and celebrated in a way that you may not have experienced before.

As a Midlife Coach, I have worked with people who want to -

• Have a better work/life balance

• Find new passions and purpose after raising children

• Explore creativity and enjoy more creativity in life

• Manage the perimenopause journey

• Improve communication skills in the workplace

• Map out a new working life or change of direction

• Have stronger relationships with friends and family

• Build a new community and relationships after relocating

• Prepare for retirement

• Move on after loss

• Plan a relocation

• Develop self-belief and confidence

• Return to the workplace after a career break

Anyone who has ever looked to find a Life Coach for themselves is faced with an array of choices, with coaches offering a wide range of coaching niches, styles, approaches, strategies and methods.

I am proud to say that I am a heart centred coach and I run a heart centred business. Following my initial coach training in Life and Performance Coaching with NLP (Neuro linguistic programming), I was aware that I wanted to coach in a way that really enabled my clients to feel into the work that they are doing, to listen to their hearts, re-connect with their inner self, ignite their passions, and find alignment with who they truly are. As I now graduate from the Beautiful You Coaching Academy, I have exactly the tools in my toolbox that I was seeking. In addition to this, I am able to have a business that aligns with my values, strengths and energy as a Midlife Introvert.

As a ‘Quiet Empowerment Coach’, I connect with women who identify with an introverted preference, who recognise or are beginning to understand how their quiet nature and energy needs impact on their lives and on how they want to live and flourish as they transition through mid-life. I will hold space for you and work at a pace that is right for you to achieve your goals and grow  in this amazing phase of life.

In coaching with me, you will not only identify and act upon your most self-actualising goals, but you will also go on an amazing journey, one that promotes and enhances all areas of ‘self’ – self-care, self-worth, self-compassion, self-confidence and self-love.

It is a world away from the sports coaches and business gurus that led the way back in the 1980’s but it is a world that is coming within reach of more and more of us. Whatever you hope to achieve, there is a Life Coach who can help you.

If you are, or you know, a woman in her middle years who may also describe herself as an introvert, who has hopes, dreams and a vision for her life but needs some gentle support and accountability, you know where to find me…

 Jo x